evim bana anlamsız bir hüzün vermeye başladı bundardır ki sürekli dışarılardayım. eve gelince mümkün olduğunca çabuk uyumaya çalışıyorum (ki bu benim hiç hiç zor bir şey değil, yastıkla buluştuğum an geçiyorum öteki tarafa) yaz geldi, eski arkadaşları görmeceler , eğlenmeceler peki neden hayatım sanki hep anlamsızmış, sanki hiç tatmin olamıyormuşum gibi geliyor? nedir eksik olan, eksikliğini hissettiğim? adım adım yürüdüğüm duygu-suz-laşma mıdır beni strese sokan? dönüştüğüm "şey" beni çok korkutuyor.

Blog nasilsin? Garip seyler oluyor. Anlam veremiyorum zaten vermeye de çalışmıyorum . Hayat garip sürprizlerle dolu.

hellloooo

need to write moreeeeeeeeeee! there is so much to tell!

my card of the day

Zen Tarot Card
Rebirth

In Zen you are coming from nowhere and you are going to nowhere. You are just now, here, neither coming nor going. Everything passes by you; your consciousness reflects it but it does not get identified. When a lion roars in front of a mirror, do you think the mirror roars? Or when the lion is gone and a child comes dancing, the mirror completely forgets about the lion and starts dancing with the child--do you think the mirror dances with the child? The mirror does nothing, it simply reflects. Your consciousness is only a mirror. Neither do you come, nor do you go. Things come and go. You become young, you become old; you are alive, you are dead. All these states are simply reflections in an eternal pool of consciousness.

Osho Osho Live Zen, Volume, 2 Chapter 16



Commentary:

This card depicts the evolution of consciousness as it is described by Friedrich Nietzsche in his book, Thus Spake Zarathustra. He speaks of the three levels of Camel, Lion and Child. The camel is sleepy, dull, self-satisfied. He lives in delusion, thinking he's a mountain peak, but really he is so concerned with others' opinions that he hardly has any energy of his own. Emerging from the camel is the lion. When we realize we've been missing life, we start saying no to the demands of others. We move out of the crowd, alone and proud, roaring our truth. But this is not the end. Finally the child emerges, neither acquiescent nor rebellious, but innocent and spontaneous and true to his own being. Whatever the space you're in right now--sleepy and depressed, or roaring and rebellious--be aware that it will evolve into something new if you allow it. It is a time of growth and change.

haziranda milano floransa roma yuppi (:

19 mayıs polonezköy pikniği de pek güzeldi canım ((:

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